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Twilight

Pookieluv Edit

The first time I tried to read Twilight, I only got to chapter 4. I just hated it SO much. A few years later, when I was a little older, I read Twilight again. That time I got to chapter 5. Just in case you haven't read Twilight yet, here's a summary:

I'm Bella. I love Edward. Edward is amazing. Edward will never like me. I'm not good enough for Edward, who, by the way is a vampire. And he has sparkly skin. Edward must hate me. I love Edward. Edward must hate me. I love Edward. Edward must hate me. I love Edward. Oh, look, it's Jacob. I love Jacob. And Edward. Surely they must both hate me. But I love them. I will never be good enough for them. My life is horrible. The end.

That. Is. Literally. The. Entire. Book.

But what I hate the most about Twilight is the people that like Twilight. I mean, how could you POSSIBLY read this crap? It's horrible! I could write a book better than that. I HAVE written books better than that. I'm going to send one of my books to a publisher just so I can tell people "I'm 13 and I published a book that's better than Twilight." It'll be awesome.

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